Insufficient Funds

"Insufficient funds!" "We just got your labs back and the doctor NEEDS to see you ASAP!" From the child who rarely shares: "Dad, we need to talk." "This is a collect call from XYZ County Jail will you accept the charges?" "This is State Trooper Sutton, what is your relation to ________?" "I regret to inform you..." These, and probably a few dozen other scenarios, can shrink one's world in a heartbeat. How do we reconcile the above statements or questions with Psalm 8, where God lavishes his care upon us? Or Psalm 16, where David says, "The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places?"
I want you to know that the health and wealth "gospel" is alive and well in Reformed theological circles and in PCA churches, AND I am the chief of sinners who secretly wants health and wealth more than I want Jesus. I also want you to know that my view of God and His blessings are very small because of my just-below-the-surface health and wealth commitments. Why would I make such a statement? Because when the margins of your world shrink in the blink of an eye, you are given a choice: to trust God in the middle of the awful, or to long with every fiber of your being for the awful to be removed. You obviously can do both, but, at least for me, I'm not sure I wouldn't trade trusting in God for being relieved of my pain and worry.
In the past I have glossed over the temptation of Jesus in the wilderness, but think on it with me for just a few minutes. This took place after being a human for 30 years, enduring the whispers of being an illegitimate child, of seeing His creation marred so much, of the constant doubt about who He is even within His own family. And now under extreme physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual duress He is given the choice: trust God or have your immediate pain relieved. All of it is a precursor leading up to the cross. And the temptations didn't stop after this event, Satan's attacks, as they always are, were purposed and relentless. I am thankful that I am united to Jesus and that His obedience is my obedience because my obedience is often lacking, and the worst of it you can't even see.
So what do I need to do and maybe if this resonates, what could you join me in doing? The plain and simple truth is repent and believe, yet again. All of us, your pastor included, are often blind to the majesty and lavish nature of our God. Maybe repentance looks like allowing people, including yourself, to be wrong and then to give them and you, perhaps at great cost, the space and time to repent and believe. I really want to qualify right now what I exactly mean by "wrong", but I am not going to. My reason being that the space and time and ways folks repent and believe are as different as our fingerprints. The only constant in an insufficient funds world is the ALL SUFFICIENCY OF CHRIST, His life, His death, His resurrection, His sending of the Spirit, His constant intercession for us, His promises in Scripture and the certainty of His return and of a new heavens and new earth. I literally have nothing else, and my reason for writing to you is to plead with to find your nothing else in Christ also.